Sunday, November 7, 2010
When everything went wrong.
Last night was a disaster.
What supposed to be a fun night ended in horror.
A few of us decided to have fun, and go clubbing since we haven't club together in such a long time. So at 10.30pm, all of us found ourselves outside Double O, waiting to enter the club. The night started off fantastic, but I should have just got the bad omen. The moment I entered the club, I realized that my perfectly folded $50 bill was torn into 2 pieces. I don't know how it happened because I folded it nicely and placed it in my pocket. I should have known the night will turn into a disaster.
Anyhow, started off with 3 jugs of drinks. Then a tequila shot. Then a free set of shots from a patron who saw us dancing on the floor. Then another shot. And another jug. And another shot. And another. And another. And another.
And danced. Danced.
And in the midst of it all, I lost my friends. I didn't know where they went. I was stuck with a friend's friend... and I begged her to save me because I know I was already drunk. Then I don't know where she went... And I started accepting drinks from strangers around me.
And bam!
I can't recall everything that happened after that.
I could only pick up bits and pieces, like watching myself from another person's point of view. Standing outside the toilet, clinging onto a random stranger, begging him to help me. Then it moved to me lying down at the corner, and started puking. And can't even get up at all. I remembered someone prying open my eyes to check my pupils, and checking my pulse. I remembered my friends screaming into my ears, although I can't really make out whatever they were saying. I remembered hitting my head hard against something.
Then it was blank.
And when I opened my eyes again, I was in my friend's room, and she was cleaning me up from the mess.
Then blank.
Then I woke up, it was daylight I saw.
It was a night of horrors. I'm not usually one who lose control over liquor. But last night was a total nightmare. I didn't know what happened, or how it happened. It was really terrible...
I'm lucky the random stranger who was with me was honestly trying to help me. I'm thankful I did not wake up in a strange bed, with a stranger next to me. I am really thankful. For anything could have happened, and I wouldn't remember anything. All I would remember will be regret, and guilt.
Now, I have a huge bump on my forehead, and another bump on my left knee, with random bruises all over my body. My entire body is aching ever so bad.
I do not want to remember last night. Not even a single bit.
--
I've enquired with Temasek Poly regarding the course. They told me that I'm not entitled to a tuition grant, and that I have to pay the full price for the course... And I calculated, and it will cost me $40k. Where the hell am I gonna find that amount of money?!
I really want to take up that course. I want to start fresh in 2011. I want to leave all these behind me. Especially nursing.
I can just hope that I am able to find that money for the course.
--
At the rate life is going for me right now, I think I might die by the time I reach 30. Everything is happening so fast. Responsibilities, burdens. I'm barely enjoying life.
When was the last time I had a relaxing vacation?
When was the last time I made full use of my annual leave to just relax?
When was the last time I went overseas?
When was the last time I enjoyed myself without a care in the world?
I'm so tired.
I wanna wake up being somebody else.
Perhaps I should take up smoking again. Kill my lungs. Then kill my liver with my binge drinking.
I'm really tired.
2011 better be good.
the beauty exposed ; 6:05 AM
Monday, November 1, 2010
Digital forensics
And yet another 2 weeks seem to pass by ever so quickly!
Where has all my blogging posts gone to?
I am trying very very hard to blog more frequently, and I am rather sad to say that this has slowly turned into a chore. That is really bad and sad news.
I am going to try.
I am going to bring out my camera each time I head out, and take nonsensical pictures of the day. I can't believe I bought a Dual HD camera without using it... I got it in June, and now it's already November. I am not going to waste the money for nothing. But I feel rather out whipping out the camera because it is rather huge, and it's hot pink, and it's just like a camcorder.
But I will try to overcome it, and take more pictures.
More pictures = more blog entries.
As you all have known, I have another blog. I suppose that blog will cater to 'Outfits of the day and Looks of the day'. Solely on fashion, and makeup.
--
Anyhow, proper updates.
I'm planning to resign in late January, so that I don't have to return my bonus. So I guess I will leave nursing in February. I am keen on starting a new life, with a new career and such.
I've been browsing through courses available, and believe it or not, I think I might be going back to Polytechnic to get another diploma... and hopefully, the right one this time. I've been targeting the course Digital Forensics being offered by Temasek Poly for a while now, but I am not sure if the course is opened to people like me... people who wants a mid-career change. I am very much interested in become a CSI, investigating, cracking into things and getting to the bottom of everything. And what more, I get to work with computers.
I just emailed TP this morning to enquire about their admissions criteria, and if I am eligible for the course. I sure as hell hope I am able to take it up. If I am able to, that will definitely mean I will be the oldest in class, being 22 years old. And I will only graduate at 25 years old. I guess that is not too old yet.
I really want to leave nursing behind forever, and embark on a new journey.
I really hope the course will be my new destination.
I hope 2011 will bring me an interesting journey.
*Crossing my fingers and toes*
Pray for me, will you?
the beauty exposed ; 10:10 AM
